feeling good!

I feel great today!!!! It's amazing how a hair cut can change your whole attitude. I woke up this morning feeling refreshed... and it helps that Jonathan slept for 6 hours and then another 3 after I put him back down 40 minutes later. I feel like the past 8 weeks I haven't been taking care of myself much. I never did my hair or makeup anymore, haven't been exercising much, except for the occasional walk I took Jonathan on, and probably haven't been eating the best either. I look forward to taking back the controls over my life... at least as much as I can with a baby! So, I made myself some goals:

*take 20 minutes a day to take care of myself.. do my hair, makeup, take a bath, etc.

*eat healthier... I want to lose another 10 lbs over the next year... I'll have to wait to really diet until after I stop nursing

*continue doing a daily biblestudy/prayer journal

*exercise 3-4x a week. I have the Ab lounge.. so I really should be working on my stomach more..lol

*just enjoy life!

We'll see how I do.

here are the before and after shots of my haircut... what a difference! I went to Carter's in Grafton

Tomorrow

Tomorrow I'm getting my hair cut!!! ahhh... I'm nervous but very excited. Not sure how short I'll go, we'll see. I'm going to Carters in Grafton. I will post pictures afterwards. If anyone has any ideas what I should cut it like, let me know. I'm going to go early and look at some pictures and decide on the spot. Or I'll ask the lady what she thinks will work best on me. We'll see!!

This weekend was very busy. Friday night we went bowling with Nathan's family for his cousin's birthday. I stink at bowling... but it was nice to get out of the house. We dropped Jonathan off at my parents. We didn't want him around the smoke. Saturday we spent the day at home, it was so dreary out. I felt a little down in the dumps because of the weather. Thank God my husband was at home so I could spend time with him. Sunday we went to church. We went to Home Builders ABF for the first time. I really enjoyed, as well as Nathan. I look forward to spending more time at the group. Its just hard to go when I will be working every other weekend 1st shift, and then a lot of the other weekends we have vacations planned during the summer. Well, we'll just have to go when we can. Sunday afternoon we had lunch at my parents for my brother's 23rd birthday.. tacos.. one of my favorites! Afterwards Nathan and I went to the movies for a date. We saw "How to train your dragon" 3D. I LOVED IT!!! I highly recommend it.

Well, that was my weekend. It was busy but nice. I have 4 weeks left (3 weekends) before I have to go back to work. I'm starting to really dread it. But I should complain, I haven't worked for 10 weeks already.

Not going to feel guilty

Everyday my little Jonathan gets happier and happier

I've been working on getting him to sleep in his crib.. what a difficult thing! He cries and cries, despite being SOOO tired. He loves sleeping in his swing, or in my arms, but I feel like he is getting too use to this. I know they say you can't spoil a baby, but I've been questioning that lately and have come to conclude that.. YOU CAN. I get so many different opinions from others on what i should be doing.. don't let him cry... let him cry it out... don't use the pacifier...the pacifiers OK...and on and on. I've been overwhelmed with advice, and with all the information I've read in books... and frankly, I'm sick of it all. I'm not going to sweat it anymore. I'm going to find a system that works for us... and stick with it. When I try to live up to others expectations and try to strive for what the books tell me, I'm only left frustrated and expecting more from my baby that I should. As long as what I'm doing works for me, Nathan and Jonathan, then I'm happy! This doesn't mean that I won't ask for advice, opinions, or just freak out at anyone who tells me anything, it just means that I may or may not take that advice... and if I don't, I'm not going to feel guilty about it.

A Wife's Understanding of God: God's Protective Authority - chapter 2

Today's chapter addressed Who GOD is, what we need to know about him, what wives need to know about their works and themselves, and Why we need God's protection.

We know that the God of the bible is the sovereign, just, and loving Ruler over all the Earth and all his creatures. He is the "potter and we are the clay" Rom 9:19-20. First I want to Thank God for his gift of salvation. Jesus paid the ultimate sacrifice so that I can go to heaven to be with Him. I know I cannot get to heaven on my own. Sin is what keeps us from him. Through Christ's death and Resurrection we have been given the free gift of salvation and a chance to go to heaven.

What wives need to know about God:
1. God has planned a ministry for you - Gen 2:18: "Then the Lord God said, "It is not good fora man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him"
2. God is gracious, righteous, and compassionate (Psalm 116:1,2,5) - God will walk with me through whatever circumstance I encounter and I can completely trust Him.
3. God's strength and understanding are unlimited (Psalm 147: 3,5) - There is no limit of god's understanding, this enables Him to determine what is best for me and how I may glorify Him the most. He can also heal your heart even if it is broken. ***what a great thought!! ***
4. God is PURPOSEFULLY working in your life - Romans 8:28-29 This part encourages me the most. It's encouraging that with so many people on this earth that God still has a plan FOR ME, and is working in my life and there for me ALL the time.
5. God wants me to be a Joyful and Fulfilled wife (Proverbs 31: 13,18,25,28,29) - Joy Will come to you as you look forward to what God has planned for you!!


What wives need to know about their works and themselves:
1. God has prepared good works for the Christian wife to do - Ephesians 2:10
** Key concept that really hit home to me: "The works that God has prepared for you to do include not only what you do in your relationship with your husband, but also your heart's motive or attitude. It will help you to have the right attitude if you focus on what you are suppose to be doing, not on what your husband is suppose to be doing". this is one area that I struggled with in the past, and still do at times. God has really shown me that I need to be looking at what I'm suppose to be doing!!
2. The Christian wife's good works have eternal worth! 2 Corinthians 5:10
3. The christian wife does not have to be afraid - 1 peter 3:6
4. The focus of the Christian wife is to be on God rather than herself - Hebrews 12:1-2
5. A Christian wife does not have to sin - Romans 6:6-7

As Christian wives we need to learn to put ourselves under our husbands authority as the Bible has called us to. (1 Cor 11:4; Ephesians 5:23). This is a hard concept for a lot of women to grasp and do joyfully. When you know the Lord, and look at his scriptures you come to realize that being under our husband's authority is the best place to be. God is our ultimate authority, but under our husband's we are safe and serving God by fulfilling our ministry that He has created us for.

I continue to look forward to what this book and the Bible has to teach me. Chapter 3 is titled: A wife's understanding of Sin: God's provision. I don't know if I'll write on every chapter I read, maybe just the ones that really touch me in someway. Looking at the book though from last time I read it , I have things highlighted and underlined in every chapter. If anyone reading this wants me to continue with the chapters, let me know, and I will continue to share what the book is say.


I also don't want to just write about what I'm reading, so there may be multiple posts some days with more of my thoughts and sharing what is going on in my life. For right now, Jonathan is taking a nap and I'm going to take this time to get a shower in. :)

Proverbs 31

Today I started to reread the book "The Excellent Wife: A biblical perspective" by Martha Peace. I did this study at my old church in Sheboygan a few years back. My old prayer journal reminded me about this book, and I figured it was a good time to reread it and begin applying more biblical principles to my marriage. I have come a long way since doing this study last time, and I look forward to seeing how God is going to change me during this study again.

Today I read chapter 1: The Excellent Wife. I want to share the points that stuck out to me the most. First off, that chapter starts off with this paragraph:

"God's will for every Christian wife is that her most important ministry be to her husband (gen 2:18). After a wife's own personal relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, nothing else should have greater priority. Her husband should be the primary benefactor of his wife's time and energy, not the recipient of what may be left over at the end of the day" - this statement hit me hard. I have always had something in my life that has seem to take more of my time and energy away from my husband. Our first year of marriage it was my own selfishness. After that, school took all my energy. Now I have my son. I need to learn how to balance my time out more and spend more of my time and energy on my husband.

The chapter continue to list the traits of the Proverbs 31 wife. They are:

kind
fears the Lord
Blessed by her children
careful
praised
not afraid
worker with hands
wise
generous
good to her husband
of exceptional worth
respectful to her husband
trusted

I look at this list and thing... wow, this is IMPOSSIBLE to be ALL of those things. I felt overwhelmed while reading what God expected of ME! But wait, I can be all of those things.. but not by own power. I KNOW, that by myself I cannot do it. SIN is the only thing that can keep m from becoming a godly wife, and through my salvation with God, I am "no longer a slave to sin" (Romans 6:6) Praise God for that biblical truth! Through HIM I CAN BECOME THAT EXCELLENT WIFE!

I look forward to continuing this book and sharing what I have learned.. and most of all, putting it into practice.

Child of God

I must always remind myself in time of need.. I am a child of God. HE loves me. HE takes care of me. Thank you God for being Lord of my life.

I was reading my personal prayer journal from a few years back. I was amazed to see how similar my prayer requests were daily for that whole year. I was constantly asking God to help me to a more positive and patient person. I knew/know I can't be who God intends me to be without letting HIM work in my life. My prayer for today is that I will lay myself down at his feet, to allow HIM to mold me into the Christian he wants me to be. There is so much for me to still learn... so much for him to change in me. I've come along way since what I wrote in my prayer journal, and I praise God for the work he has done already.

I really want to start writing in my prayer journal daily again. I've been really lazy the past 3 1/2 years when it comes to that. It was fun to reread what I had wrote, to remember events that I would have otherwise forgotten. I think I'll restart one tonight.

Feeling whole again!

I am beginning to feel whole again!!!! This past week has made motherhood well worth the sleepless weeks prior. 4 our of 5 nights Jonathan has slept for 5 1/2 hours, ate and then slept for another 2 1/2 hours. I feel so much better and well rested. Then hope this routine we have continues! He is also smiling a lot more! His smiles make my heart melt. I can't wait until I can hear his little laugh as well.

This is what I have learned to work to keep his nights better. All day he eats every 3-4 hours. Once 4pm arrives we moved to eating ever 2-2 1/2 hours. At his 7:00 feeding i give him 2 ounces of formula. Sometimes he drinks less, depending on how well he nursed prior to the bottle. At 9:00 I nurse for 15 minutes, give him a bath, lotion him up and then nurse until he is ready to stop and go down, around 10pm. Thankfully he doesn't cry when I put him in his crib. I don't even have to give him the pacifier. I swaddle him, and he just looks at me, and then I leave. I do have soft music playing from after his bath and throughout the night. In a few weeks I'll turn the repeat CD option off and see how he does sleeping in quiet. Overall, this has worked for us the best. Maybe soon he'll start sleeping longer than that 5 1/2 hours, but until then, I'm not complaining!

My prayer for today.

I am overall a quiet person. My closest friends might not think so... but I am. I do not always voice my opinion or tell people what I am really thinking. I do not like arguing or debating. I like to think that I bring a sense of calm to people around me. My husband might not agree with the "I do not like arguing" statement, but I really don't. I do argue with those I am most comfortable with, and I know I need to work on that. I like to stay in the background when uncomfortable situations arise. And for the most part, I should stay quiet. But there are times that I do need to speak up... and this I need to learn.

I am overall a quiet person. I tend not to speak up when I have a great opportunity to witness to others around me because I fear I won't say the right thing, or I'll cause an argument. I need to work on that quietness. God has really been pressing on my heart to speak up and encourage those around me with God's word. I know, that by myself I am unable to do that. So this is my prayer today:

God - please give me the courage and the words to share your gospel and grace message to those around me. Allow YOU to shine through my actions and words. Be with my family members and friends who do not know you, Allow my actions to be a witness to Your testimony and love. And when a conversation arises that I can share you with them, help me to do dive in and share your Word. Amen.

my random thoughts

I always have a hard time knowing what to write about in my blog, and others have said they just sit down and type and see where their thought take them. Well, here are my thoughts.. we'll see where they go....

Days like these i sit back and take extra time to thank God for his beautiful creation. The warmth in the air is wonderful. As most people know, I like heat much better than cold. I am a summer girl. God knew what he was doing when I was born in August!

This will be the first summer since 2006 that I don't have classes or other commitments. I am looking forward to it. Here are some of my favorite things to do in summer:

tennis
bike ride
reading in my backyard
grillng out
camping
hiking
spending time with family and friends
eat ice cream!!
my birthday

This summer we have so much planned! We are going to be taking Jonathan on two camping trips! I'm a little nervous about it. Not sure how the nights will go. Worse case scenario.... take a drive! I am looking forward to spending time with family and friends. One of these trips includes a canoe trip. I am hopeing that my mom will watch Jonathan for a while so I can go out for an adventure!

Other fun things coming up include my brother's wedding May 29th! I am so happy and excited for him and Liz. She will be an awesome sister-in-law. I look forward to the friendship we will develope over the years. I also have Eric & Amies wedding in May and Chad and Erica's in June. It is a crazy wedding season for us. A friend of the family bought us a little tux for Jonathan. He'll be so cute. Can't wait to get my two men in their tuxes for pictures. I will post them later on.

This summer (June 25th) also marks Nathan and my 5 year anniversary. I look over the past 5 years and what God has done in our marriage. I went and completed nursing school, we've lived at 4 different places, bought a new car and a Harley, bought a new house, lost my father-in-law to cancer, my mom had a Pulmonary embolism, Kevin got engaged,we got 2 cats and gave them away when I got pregnant, and the latest thing: we had a son... the list goes on. And we still have 2 more months until our 5 year mark, we'll see what else will happen!

This past year and a half has been the most difficult and most rewarding year of our lives. The pain that we went though watching Robert suffer with lung cancer and passing away, to seeing the birth of our son. It has truly been an emotional roller coaster. Thank You GOD for your peace, loving kindness, and support in all that we have been though. we know that we would have fallen apart a long time ago without having Christ in our lives. He is our rock and salvation.

I leave you with my favorite verse:

For I know the plans I have for you, Declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future - Jer 29:11

Jonathan's play date

Today Jonathan had his 1st play date. We had Sonya (8 weeks) and Levi (7 weeks) over. It was so cute watching them all lie of a blanket together, staring and arms moving uncontrollably. Poor Sonya and Levi got bumped and punched by Jonathan, who didn't even really seem to know they were next to him. After the three of them finished "playing" we went for a walk and had lunch at Cousin's. It was great to spend time with other moms. I look forward to more times like these.